Sugar loving fashionista

Tempering chocolate, in all the right spots

2012-02-11T18:50:00.000-05:00

Tempering chocolate can be a down right scary experience but it doesn't have to be. In fact, tempering chocolate can be a very.... well let's just say a very good time indeed.
Chocolate is a sensual, luscious food that has been scientifically proven to put people in the mood to make sweet love down by the fire.
This is where I help out. (with tempering chocolate that is...)
With Valentines day right around the corner, you should temper a big ol' bowl of chocolate, get some assorted foods to dip into it and surprise your loved one with these goodies.

Cocoa butter is the fat in the cacao bean that gives chocolate its unique mouth-feel and stable properties. To be considered “real” chocolate, a chocolate bar or chunk can contain only cocoa butter, not any other fat. Cocoa butter is the reason why you have to “temper” real chocolate.
Cocoa butter is fat that is composed of three to four glycerides of fatty acids. What complicates matters in chocolate making is that each of these different fatty acids solidifies at a different temperature. Once you melt a chocolate bar, the fatty acid crystals separate. The objective in tempering melted chocolate is to entice the disparate fatty acid crystals of cocoa butter back into one stable form.
Tempering is like organizing individual dancers at a party into a Conga line. For chocolate, temperature and motion are the party organizers that bring all the individual dancing crystals of fatty acids together in long lines and, in the process, create a stable crystallization throughout the chocolate mass.
Also, strange as it may sound, the temperature at which well-tempered chocolate melts is much higher than untempered chocolate because the fatty acid crystals in tempered chocolate are locked together tightly—it takes a higher temperature to pull them apart. Being tightly bound, well-tempered chocolate is resistant to developing chocolate bloom—that whitish film, streaks or spots of cocoa butter that form on the surface of chocolate.
In the tempering process, melted chocolate is first cooled, causing the fatty acid crystals to form nuclei around which the other fatty acids will crystallize. Once the crystals connect, the temperature is then raised to keep them from solidifying.
To help the chocolate to crystallize during the tempering process, chocolate makers use one technique called seeding. The "seed" is tempered chocolate in hunks, wafers or grated bits. It is added at the beginning of the tempering process. These crystals of tempered chocolate act like magnets, attracting the other loose crystals of fatty acids to begin the crystallization process that results in well-tempered chocolate.

Now with all of that chocolate education out of the way, here are instructions on how to temper some dark chocolate

Chop your chocolate. It is best to use at least 1 pound of chocolate, as it is easier to temper (and retain the temper) of larger amounts of chocolate. If this is more than you need, you can always save the extra for later use. Be sure that your chocolate is in block or bar form, not chocolate chips. The chips have additives that allow them to retain their shape at higher temperatures, and so they will not temper properly.
Melt 2/3 of your chocolate. Place it in the top of a double boiler, set over simmering water. Securely clip a chocolate or instant-read thermometer to the side of the boiler to monitor the chocolate’s temperature.
Stir gently but steadily as the chocolate melts and heats up. Use a rubber spatula, they work best.
Bring the chocolate to 115 degrees (for dark chocolate) or 110 degrees (for milk or white chocolate). Do not allow the chocolate to exceed its recommended temperature. When it is at the right temperature, remove it from the heat, wipe the bottom of the bowl, and set it on a heat-proof surface.
Add the remaining chunks of chocolate and stir gently to incorporate. The warm chocolate will melt the chopped chocolate, and the newly added chocolate will bring down the temperature of the warm chocolate.
Cool the chocolate. Once the chocolate gets below 84 degrees, remove the remaining chunks of chocolate. They can be cooled, wrapped in plastic wrap, and saved for another use.
Reheat the chocolate briefly.Place the chocolate bowl over the warm water in the double boiler for 5-10 seconds, remove it and stir, and repeat, until the temperature reaches 88-89 degrees (87 for milk and white chocolate). Do not leave the chocolate over the hot water, or allow it to exceed 91 degrees.
Your chocolate should now be tempered! To make sure it has been done properly, do a spot test: spread a spoonful thinly over an area of waxed paper and allow it to cool. If the chocolate is shiny and smooth, it is properly tempered. If it is dull or streaky, it has not been tempered correctly.

sugar cookies!

2011-12-26T15:00:00.000-05:00

Sugar Cookies!

4 1/2 Cups flour

4 tsp Baking Powder

1 tsp Salt

1/2 lb unsalted butter

2 cups sugar

2 eggs

1/2 cup milk

1 tsp Vanilla extract

1 Tablespoon Orange Zest

1 Tablespoon Lemon Zest

Sift the flour, baking powder and salt together

Cream the lemon and orange zest with the butter and sugar

Add eggs and mix very well

Add the vanilla into the milk

Add the dry ingredients into the butter mixture, slowly add the vanilla and milk till well combined.

Shape into a round disk and wrap well with saran wrap and let chill in fridge for at least 1 hour.

Roll out a section of dough on a counter top that is dusted with flour and powdered sugar, cut into desired shapes and place on cookie sheet and bake in an 375 degree oven for about 8-10 minutes

Let cool well before frosting

Yummy soft frosting

1 cup unsalted butter

1 cup organic shortening

2 pinches of salt

8 cups powdered sugar

2 Tablespoons meringue powder (optional but you really should add it)

4-6 Tablespoons of water

Cream together the shortening and butter till creamy and shiny and lump free

add salt and mix again very well

Add meringue powder, mix well

add 4 cups of the powdered sugar and mix very very well, if needed add 2 Tablespoons of water

Add the remaining powdered sugar and mix very, very, very well. If needed, add another 2 Tablespoons of water till the desired conistency is achieved. Then let it mix again, very well. Just walk away and take a break while your mixer mixes that yummy frosting till it is as light as a cloud.

Store in an airtight container

Lets hope I dont get sued...

2011-11-22T20:07:00.000-05:00

Don't you just love cakes with characters on them? With no fondant anywhere? I know, I do too. These are all made out of yummy yummy frosting. Next post will be Barbie cakes, you know you want one...

Add caption

2011-11-15T17:13:00.002-05:00

2011-11-10T13:33:00.004-05:00

Not the Benihana I grew up going to...

2011-07-29T20:35:00.000-04:00

Growing up, going to Benihana was the most exotic experience when it came to eating out for me.
I also grew up hating cheese and I didn't try pesto until I had moved to the East Coast when I was 19 years old, so there's all that... And that has all since changed, greatly.
Going to Benihana was for special occasions only. Hell, I even went there for a prom in High School.
Thats. Just. Pitiful.
Even still, it was so exciting to be served by waitresses that were dressed up in kimonos and the chef that cooks right at your table executing his culinary prowess by making an onion volcano and flipping the shrimp tails up into his chef hat, all done with lighting speed. That was just awesome to me.
Fast forward a few years... (ok ok, more like 20 years. Flippin hell, I live in the delusion that I don't age)

We just got back from Japan to visit my husbands family and on our last day there, my in-laws took us to a special restaurant that they have been to several times. Pulling into the parking lot I could tell this was truly some place held for special occasions. Maybe even prom. Do they have prom in Japan? If they do I bet they get graded and study like mad for it.

Here is my daughter and her Obachan (Grandma) walking up to the front door.

Upon arriving we were seated in a cozy booth and served some chilled tea. Super yummy chilled tea. I don't really care for tea but it was so pretty I just had to try it and I was so glad that I did. Then we were lead to our own private room, here is the view from where I sat;

I thought, oh ok, this is like Benihana. WRONG. So so so wrong. This was our first course, it was a chilled ginger gelee with chilled poached lobster. It was perfect to start off with on a mega hot day. It was also, not prepared in front of us...

After the lobster we had chilled corn chowder. I hate calling it chowder because it was more elegant then chowder, it was creamy and velvety while at the same time punched you in the mouth it was so yummy.

For our next course we had grilled Halibut over the most amazing, flavorful, delicate ratatouille I have ever had the pleasure of tasting.

It was only after our fish course did our chef enter our room;

With him he brought elephant garlic and the most beautiful piece of meat and fat, that's right, I said fat that I have ever seen. And I have seen A LOT of fat, I worked in fast-food when I was a teenager...

Thats the fat

He worked slowly and gracefully. Really slow. Really Really slow. He cooked the sliced elephant garlic till they were golden brown and crispy. Then he started on the steak. There was no banging with the salt and pepper containers, no fancy slicing and dicing as if on an info-mmercial. He just moved his knife and tools gracefully along the grill like a graceful ice skater.

The waitress brought in little dishes one filled with ponzu sauce (lemon and soy sauce mixed together) and one with soy sauce to dip our steak in. He dished up our steaks with a side of paper thin sliced onions. Perfection on a plate. As we ate our steaks, he took to the fat. He sliced it thin then cooked it till it was crispy. If there is a pure perfect way to eat fat, this my friends would be the way.

He then made garlic fried rice and served with a pickled Japanese cucumber. I loved the garlic rice and I am pretty sure that everyone on the plane the next day suffered for it...

Once we were finished we ushered into this cozy little lounge area for dessert

This was our view from this cozy little nook

Japan does something just crazy. They eat fruits and veggies... only when they are IN SEASON! I know, crazy right? While we were there peaches were in season so I jumped at the chance for this dessert of a chilled peach with peach sorbet

Uhm, yeah, excuse me? How perfect does that look? It tasted just as perfect. The peach was skinned and pitted, that was it. It was soft with just a slight crunch and had so much flavor it could rival a Georgia peach. Oh that's right, I went there... the peach sorbet was in the middle of the peach and was gently pouring down the sides of it, sweet love of Buddha, the perfect summer dessert. A perfect example of when you have great ingredients, there is not much you have to do to them to prepare something that will knock your socks off. True story.

My husband ordered this dessert, it was a Molasses mousse with an espresso custard sprinkled with cocoa nibs. The sound of it turned me off to be honest. Don't get me wrong, I love a good Molasses cookie. Well, I got served. It was just glorious. The Molasses mousse was such a light and flavorful surprise and the espresso custard was a custard that custards wish to be one day, it held together well without being gelatinous (if that isn't a word I am making it one now, gelatinous) There were other things going on in there but I am not sure exactly and the menu was in Japanese... I am pretty sure that there was also an espresso gelee as well.

It was an amazing meal and the portions were perfect. Something most American restaurants could take a lesson from. Every bite was full of flavor and pretty straight forward, nothing was too technical at all. I said it before and I will say it again, when you have fresh, in season ingredients, you don't need to add a lot of other stuff to make an amazing meal, rather just a few things to enhance the already natural flavors that are just waiting to punch you in your taste buds.

True story.

Carbs that check you out

2011-07-28T11:48:00.000-04:00

I just got back from visiting my husbands family in Japan, besides the heat wave and feeling about 5 earthquakes, we had a blast. I really love Japan and look forward to our visits there.

I also stick out like a blonde sore thumb, a blonde round eye in the suburbs of Tokyo aren't exactly commonplace, so I get a lot of very polite second looks.
At the natural hot springs where swimsuits are not allowed and there are closed off sections for the males and females to enjoy the hot springs, I really, really stick out. A blonde, round eye with curves really sticks out in a naked Japanese crowd. It's oh so comfortable for me...

But I digress, as usual. Right after France, I think that Japan has the best patisseries. Somehow though, the Japanese manage to make things taste not as sweet, and its amazing. It's wild to taste a pastry that is light and airy, so light and airy it fools you into thinking that it has less calories so you should probably have 12... A girl can dream...

These are the most clever looking croissants I have ever seen and they tasted amazing. For the chocolate croissants, they made the dough chocolate rather then baking a piece of chocolate folded into the middle (which I love) I was curious if they would taste chocolatey because a lot of times once something is baked off it can lose that real chocolate taste, not the case here. Holy hell, is your mouth not watering for one of these things?

We got almost one of everything and they tasted as good as they looked. My favorite was the brioche, on the bottom right. The dough was cubed and sprinkled with sugar. Oh mommy likes a lot, a lot, a lot.

The perfectly shaped bread? More brioche. I really loved it and thought it was such a clever way to serve brioche. Yes please!

I don't know about you but I found these to be irresistible. Oh sure, I have, in the past heard from a delicious looking pastry calling me from behind the counter, but to stare me down like this?!??! How could I leave any of these behind? Besides, they are filled with a chocolate cream that will make you want to smack your grandma...

I swear these things look like pitiful orphans... pitiful orphan bread that wants you to eat it. So I did. Judge me, I do.

If you go to Japan, do not miss going to any patisserie you lay your eyes on, you will not be let down.
True story

Big in Japan when it is so so so hot...

2011-07-19T21:07:00.000-04:00

whew! Me and my family are visiting my husbands family in Tokyo. During a heatwave. Not to mention the many aftershock earthquakes. I am gonna go home with a heat rash and a nervous tick...
Its so hot here that I have been wearing capri`s and tank tops and thats about it. Since being here I have been window shopping and salivating. We went to Chanel in Harajuku and I fell in love with a bag, shocking, I know. It was covered in moss green big sequins, yummy, yummy, yummy. Total hard on.
Today we are going to Shinjuku to see the Hachiko statue and Kirna Zabete at Takashimaya. I dont even bother buying clothes here, sizes are made to fit the small straight Asian frame, which is the total opposite of my curvy viking frame. Thank Buddha jewlery and bags fit everyone...

Hey Brad! Meet me in St. Louis, with a fork!

2011-06-17T15:45:00.000-04:00

I am sure that just like me, your head is swimming with questions such as; "Will Arnie spend this upcoming Fathers day with his house-keeper and their love-child?" "Will Hugh Hefner find true love with a new blonde fetus after his current one dumped him just days before their wedding?" His now ex-blondebot released a statement saying "that after much deep reflection and thought" she should not get married.
Hmm, that just begs the question, just how much deep reflection and thought can one have just moments after exiting the birthing canal?

Anyhoo, with all these news worthy events happening and my bum arm keeping me from cooking, I thought I should keep myself busy with things that I can do with mostly my one good arm. Right away, I thought of making a Gooey Butter Cake. What is a Gooey Butter Cake? IT'S WONDERFUL!!! Anything that has Gooey and Butter in its name, has me at its whim.

Missouri has blessed this world with many great things. Off the top of my head, here are a few; Brad Pitt, my dear friend Amy, BBQ and Gooey Butter Cake.
I wont lie, my left arm (the one with the fractured shoulder) is shaking like crazy now and somewhat in pain, making Gooey Butter Cake is worth it.

You will need to go and get these ingredients;

1 - vanilla cake mix (I prefer French Vanilla by Duncan Hines) Thats right, cake mix. Don't be a snob.
5 Large Eggs
1 - 8 oz package cream cheese
1 - tsp Vanilla
4 cups powdered sugar
1 stick butter, melted and cooled
The juice from 2 lemons (optional really but oh so yummy!)

Mix the cake mix with the melted butter, 3 eggs and vanilla extract and then mix it very, very, very well. You want no lumps in the batter.

Spread the batter into a 9x13 baking dish that has been greased up with Pam or shortening, whatever suits you best.

Put the cream cheese in the microwave for 45 seconds. My microwave has mad skills so I only had to put it in for 25 seconds, you want it soft and gooey. You know your microwave best, do what works best for you.
Add to that;
3 1/2 cups of the powdered sugar
2 eggs
lemon juice

Now mix this up till it looks like this;

Now pour this gooey mixture over the cake batter and bake in a 350 degree oven for about 25 - 30 minutes. Its VERY important NOT to over bake or under bake. When you shake the pan it should jiggle like jello and look like this;

Now let it cool and once it's cooled, sprinkle the rest of the powdered sugar all over it. Then put it in your fridge for at least an hour. Then buckle up, you are in for a wild gooey ride and everyone around you will celebrate your culinary masterpiece!!!

Gooey Butter Cake is so good it will make you forget all about the life struggles that Arnie and Hugh are going through and just what will they do next?

What I really really want, again

2011-05-31T12:52:00.001-04:00

Ok, could this dress BE MORE ME???? I want this dress...

http://www.davidmeister.com/daytime-dresses/floral-print-stretch-sateen-dress/invt/ckuoqp7958/

With these shoes......

http://www.saksfifthavenue.com/main/ProductDetail.jsp?FOLDER<>folder_id=2534374306418098&PRODUCT<>prd_id=845524446389771&R=885124034304&P_name=Yves+Saint+Laurent&N=306418098&ASSORTMENT<>ast_id=1408474395222441&bmUID=j17osdJ

And this bag...

http://www.barneys.com/Happy-Shoulder-Bag/00505009950191,default,pd.html

Once I am all dressed, I will head over to Lulu's Cake Boutique in Chelsea and I will eat this...

http://chelsea.everythinglulu.com/page.asp?content_id=23667

What are those you ask? Twinkies, for us "grown-ups" that grew up loving those synthetic store bought morsels of snack cake masterpieces. My favorite Lu-lu cakes (as they are called at Lulus) is the passion fruit curd filled vanilla cake that is enrobed in white chocolate. The red velvet Lulu is just damn right magical.

So those are all the things I want right now. But alas, I am home with my broken arm wearing a skirt I got from Anthropologie 11 years ago with a tank top and flip-flops, determined not to have another summer hating myself cuz my thighs touch at the top.
I am gonna switch up my eating for the month of June. I cant work out because of my broken arm and I damn sure I am putting in more calories then are going out, so something has to change;
I'm gonna journal here and let you all know how it goes.
I ordered some protein shaky thingy that obviously takes some getting used too, almost all the comments on the website ask how to make it taste better.
So here goes, no sugar, no coffee, nothing white, strictly for 2 weeks. I MIGHT just cheat at night with a sugar free pudding pop.

When I reach my "in-shape goal" I am gonna buy the David Meister dress. I hope to Buddha it is still available at the end of June....
To be continued....

Wholefoods 2 bite cupcakes

2011-05-09T21:47:00.000-04:00

<$BlogMetaData$> Ok, while I'm laid up with my shattered arm & I can't bake or shop for pretty summer dresses that I am desperately in need of (dammit) I'm gonna post about some of my most favorite treats. At the top of this list? Whole Foods vanilla 2 bite cupcakes. That's right. Whole Foods. They "claim" that they use all natural ingredients but I dunno. I'm convinced they put in several various addictive ingredients that make you crave it a fortnight. The frosting, I'm convinced has organic shortening in it & I HAVE NO PROBLEMS at all with that. It's light and airy but rich at the same time without being greasy at all. The cake is light like angel food cake but velvety and buttery like pound cake, the perfect storm. They call them 2 bite but I manage to get about 4 bites out of each one, trying to make them last. 12 come in a package and I won't lie, I've totally killed an entire package. All. By. Myself. Little phuckers. I'm fantasizing about those little bitches right now, trying to stay strong. Namaste. Now you go & get 'em and feel my pain.... And joy. Report back to me & let me know your thoughts

Envy

2011-04-29T19:26:00.000-04:00

<$BlogMetaData$> My arm is shattered, it sucks. I have serious envy issues over Kate Middleton. And the guys who host Ghost Adventures on the travel channel are the epitome of douche bags, they give those studs on Ghost Hunters on the scifi channel a bad name. phuckers. I've been watching A LOT of tv since I broke my arm. I'm so excited to watch the second episode of "Unique Sweets" this Sunday on The Cooking Channel, 10:30pm EST and not be completely high on morphine. (The only painkiller I'm not allergic too) that's right, I said NOT high. It's hard to tell if I did a good job or not, watching through morphine high vision goggles. With my broken arm I won't be able to do much baking for at least 6 weeks :( Heart, officially broken. Maybe I will experiment with one armed baking.... We shall see!

One of my new gigs

2011-04-05T22:24:00.000-04:00

Hey all! I'm super excited to tell you about a new show that is debuting April 24th 10:30pm, EST on The Cooking Channel called "Unique Sweets". It's a spin off from their show "Unique Eats" featuring, believe it or not unique sweets.... With moi as a contributing hostess with the mostess. Tune in and find out about some truly unique sweets all across America! Peace out y'all!

What I have a hard on for RIGHT NOW

2011-03-28T20:59:00.002-04:00

All of this, this would all really work for me. The skirt would be perfect for my "birth giving hips" (My grandma promised me my whole life that childbirth would be a breeze due to my wide and girthy hips that ran clearly on that side of the family) First thing is first, I never found solace with those words... And it was SUCH LIES!!! Child birth was not easy what-so-ever, hence I have one child. But I digress... as always.
The super cute Alexander Wang t-shirt is just trendy yet timeless at the same time for my taste. Do I even need to go in to as why I need the jacket? This whole look is right up my "birth giving hips" alley.

And I am LOVING these Charlotte Olympia shoes, she's really rocking my world. I would need some serious doses of vicodin* to last an entire night in these bad boys. But anything for the name of fashion. After a full night on vicodin* while wearing these shoes, I would very much resemble a weeble that woobles but doesn't fall down.

I was clearly the muse for Thakoon in this line... I mean sweet love of Buddha!

I love it, I love it, I love it all. Thank you Thakoon, you traumatize me.

These dresses seriously give me a fashion hard on... As do the shoes and bag...

This Rochas peony dress? (on top at left) And this Rochas deep plunging dress (just below the peony dress) for my super busy social life? YES PLEEEEEZE! How in the name of Jerzzeey do these designers all design with me in mind? It's just shocking. I like these Manolo Blahnik (purple) for the peony dress and the blue sparkly, crystally Louboutins for the plunging dress.
And I think I am loving the sparkly Lanvin bag for both dresses. Cuz I'm a rebel. Or clueless. Whichever it is, I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and gosh darnit! People like me!

* I do not use vicodin to wear shoes. I dont use vicodin to wear anything. Everything is under control

Fashion week fall 2011, a novella of a post....

2011-02-21T10:48:00.001-05:00

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Oh fashion week, I love you, I really do. Even before I ever even got into any of the shows I've loved you.
As you may have noticed, I have a severe, passionate, almost painful love affair with fashion and fashion week brings a palpable energy to this already very energetic city.
Every February the Fall ready-to-wear collections are shown to the hungry fashion masses. People don't just go to the shows to see what will be gracing emaciated models bodies for the following Fall/Winter season, people also go to see what the fashion elite are wearing now.
It's a real feast for the eyes. And eyes only as clearly no one has eaten in these tents...

The Fall/Winter season for clothes is by far my favorite season. The rich colors, the mixing of textiles, the layering of soft yummy sweaters, the way plaid always seems so "new" every fall and with the cooler temps brings the justification to wear leggings under EVERYTHING...

There's all that and the issue that my thighs touch at the top producing the dreaded chub rub. If you have to ask what that is, you're a skinny bitch and more then likely cant understand or appreciate the struggle us small waisted/big bottom girls go through to find pants. But alas, I have no hate for skinny bitches, honest I don't. Possibly some serious jealousy issues but no hate anywhere.

I've struggled with my weight my entire life. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a self loather that spews hate onto myself and/or any skinny bitch that is within my chubby reach.
While I hate my shape (have I mentioned that I have a small waist and a big ol' butt? But who has issues?) I'm quite comfortable in my own skin. Really, true story. I work out 6 days a week and I'm fairly middle of the road, I'm not thin but I'm not fat. If I have PMS, well then, that's an entirely different frame. Of mind and body.
With my small waist and big butt, many, many, many people have always told me "but men want something to hold on too!"
First thing is first, I'M not a man, I don't want a big butt! And hold on too? For what?!?!?!?! If any man (my husband included) ever needed to hold onto my butt to save his life, Godspeed man, Godspeed.

I'm not a man, I'm a girl, a girl standing here with a big butt asking for you to love me...

I have many girlfriends who have the type of figure that no matter what they have on, they look gorgeous. Bitches. (You got that I filled bitches with all sorts of love, right?)
I am SO not that girl.
Anyone that knows me knows that I hate my butt. (Have you picked up on that yet?)

With all that said, in my journey of fashion, finding designers that cut for girls my size is never easy.... And surprise, surprise what I have found is that a good number of designers that fit me REALLY well are some of the most expensive. Sunuvabitch. Go figure.

So here are my favorite shows from Fall RTW 2011. These designers I buy from on a regular basis & they fit me & my JLo ass just great AND they wont break the bank (you can find all of these collections at www.style.com

Rebecca Taylor

Nanette Lepore

This designer I only have a few pieces but I would LOVE to have more... She is SO my style;
Barbra Tfank

I have some pieces from these following designers and they fit me & will TOTALLY break the bank; Alexander Wang

Derek Lam

Jason Wu

Peter Som

Thakoon

(let's hear it for the Asian persuasion! All of the above are Asian & super adorable themselves)

I have a couple pieces from this designer only tops though, so I can't tell you if they fit us big bottom girls that make the world go round. I always HATED that song;

Rag & Bone

I don't have one thing from the below designers, I have no idea how they would fit my thick American frame and I don't care, they are so gorgeous I would be happy just to have anything from these designers just hanging in my closet. I would also have to take a second mortgage on our condo to afford them & quite frankly, I believe totally worth it;

Chado Ralph Rucci

Christian Cota

Christian Siriano

Douglas Hannat

Issa

Adam

Sophie Theallet

And oh my god did I want to hate her line before she even got started but I can't, she really knows what she is doing..... Victoria Beckham

She should really smile more, from the looks of it she has A LOT to smile about. She's probably just really hungry or has to make a poo.

So there you have it, my fav's of Fall Ready-To-Wear 2011. I will now be wishing my summer away.... Here in Feburary.
I am off to do some Wii fit. Dont be jealous, I live the big life

There are scones... and then there is fried dough, both good

2011-02-05T15:37:00.000-05:00

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Growing up in Utah, I had what I thought were scones and they were such a treat!! They were light, airy, rectangle shaped, slathered with honey butter... fried dough. All good things!! But not by any means a true scone. In Utah there is a chain of restuarants called Sconecutter, their motto "Anything is better on a scone" I SO beg to differ. They are open 24 hours with a 24 hour drive through window for those times when getting out of your car for some fried dough is just too much of a hassle. You can get pretty much any sort of filling for said "scones" You gotcher turkey club scone, your french dip scone, your philly cheese steak scone and of course the navajo taco scone. (Have any of you watched "Gentlemen Bronco's" yet?) Now, I grew up going down to The Sconecutter and loving it every time. I even dated someone that would get a grilled cheese scone. The levels of wrong with that are many and varied.
It wasn't until I was in Cape Town, South Africa when I finally had a real scun. (thats how its said down there) It was first of all triangle in shape and not fried. They were light and tender with a buttery flavor and gentle sweetness. They are often served with lemon curd, clotted cream (a thick cream made from scalded milk, duh-vine!) and jam. Do I even need to mention they are usually always served with tea? I would like to think that it goes without saying.
I will never, ever, ever consider a big square piece of fried dough a scone again.
With that said, I have not and will never, forget my roots. One visit home my sister and brother-in-law and I found ourselves oddly craving something sweet and yummy and lets just say for arguments sake, it was 4:20 am.... We began our journey, down to The Sconecutter. Oddly enough we had uncontrolable fits of laughter the whole drive down. Things can be REALLY funny at 4:20. We get to the drive through and place our order, 3 "scones" with honey butter, the young gentelman taking our order then asked us if we wanted whole wheat or white scones. To which my response was "I think when you are asking for some fried dough, the whole "whole wheat" thing goes out the window and doesnt really mean much while its swimming in a vat of hot grease. Now step on it, we are ravenous!"
They were really, really yummy. In a not anything like a scone in anyway kind of way.
If you find yourself in Utah and happen across one of these chain restaurants, go ahead and try it. Just think of it more of a fried dough cutter.
Since I lived in South Africa, I went to culinary school and have worked at some of the best places in NYC and I consider myself to be a masterbaker, below is my recipe for scuns. Enjoy!

Makes 8
2 cups ap flour
1 tsp baking powder
3 Tbls sugar
1/2 tsp salt
6 Tablespoons unsalted butter, sliced and chilled
1/2 cup currants (look it up, they are delightful in scuns, if you cant find any, cranberries work great)
1 cup heavy cream
Heat oven 425
Whisk together the flour, baking powder, sugar and salt.
Add the butter and quickly cut in the butter by rubbing it with your fingers (dont forget to wash your hands you filthy beast) till it looks like a bunch of coarse balls, random in size. Stir in heavy cream till dough begins to form. Place the dough (all of it) on a counter top and knead just till it comes together into a big sticky ball. (this is one time in your life that you want a big sticky ball on your counter top)
Form the dough into a disk shape (kinda like a frisbee) and cut the dough into 8 pieces (like a pizza)
Using a 1 inch round cookie cutter, cut a out the center of the disk. Separate the sections onto a baking sheet.
Mix together 2 tablespoons of heavy cream and 2 tablespoons of sugar and brush on top of each scun.
Then sprinkle each scun with some granulated sugar. Bake till the tops are light brown, about 15 minutes.
Some people like them warm, some people prefer them at room temp, you figure out what you need and go for it.... at 4:20.
Now go masterbake yourself and let me know how it goes...

Not your Nestle Toll House Chocolate Chip cookies

2011-01-02T17:16:00.001-05:00

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Watch here
www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdHN8vbyqu8&feature=nfu_in_order&list+UL

Make here,
Happy New Year! Lets bring in this new year not by immediately detoxing but by making some delicious chocolate chip cookies. Really, can you think of a better way to ring in 2011 then with a batch of homemade chocolate chip cookies right out of your oven?
Then, spread the wealth, give some to your doorman, your neighbors, your child's teacher, your mailman did you tip him by the way? If not, this might make things right between you and your mailman.
I usually hate nuts in my cookies but if you grind up some walnuts in your food processor it will add the yummy flavor of walnuts without ruining the yummy soft texture of what is sure to be the perfect chocolate chip cookie.

Sugarlovingfashionista's chocolate chip cookies

2/3 cup butter unsalted at room temp
2/3 cup shortening, dont be afraid, Whole Foods carries the good stuff (Spectrum, it's an organic Palm Oil that is free of any trans fat) Take that detox!
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1 1/4 cup dark brown sugar (packed)
2 eggs room temp
2 tsp Vanilla extract
3 cups All Purpose Flour
1 tsp Baking Soda
1 tsp Salt
2 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips
1/2 cup ground up (to almost a fine powder) walnuts

Sift the flour, Baking Soda and Salt in a bowl.
In another bowl, for me it is my beloved Kitchen Aide bowl, cream together the shortening and butter till it resembles a cloud. Add the sugars and beat it some more getting some more of that cloud action. For about 5 minutes. True Story.
Add eggs one at a time till mixed well and cloud like
Add vanilla and mix some more!
Add the dry ingredients along with the chocolate chips JUST UNTIL MIXED! In fact, its ok if you see some streaks of flour, in fact, its great. Any more mixing and you will build up the gluten. Gluten + Bread = Good Gluten + Chocolate Chip Cookies = very very bad

Scoop onto un-greased cookies sheets and bake at 375 degrees
Check at 8 minutes, if they look like they could use another couple of minutes, take them out. They will continue to cook even after you have taken them out of the oven.

You can also freeze some of your cookie dough balls and bake as needed.
Bow down and recognize!

Dont f*@k up the creme brulee!

2010-12-12T11:33:00.003-05:00

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I know, I know, nice still, I am waiting for youtube to change this white hot mess...

Creme brulee, we all love you. Yet not everyone understands you, this is where I come in to help.

While working at Le Cirque (bow down and recognize) I had to make very large quantities of creme brulee. I learned a few tricks along the way that I am all to happy to share with you, my legion of 36 strong followers, I love you all.

In my webisode I gave instruction to bake the creme brulee at 300 degrees, this is in my oven, not yours. My oven is a convection oven (this means it blows the air around for even cooking) If you don't have a convection oven, bake at 250 degrees in a hot water bath. See recipe below;

You can get a kitchen torch at Bed Bath & Beyond (in the Beyond section) Willams-Sonoma or any kitchen supply store.

Creme Brulee

1 cup dark brown sugar or Sugar in the Raw (is it just me or does that sound naughty to everyone else?)

For the Creme

4 cups Heavy Cream

1 Vanilla bean

1 Egg

6 Egg Yolks

1 cup Sugar

If you are using regular dark brown sugar, dry it out over night then pass it through a sieve.

Place the heavy cream into a nonreactive sauce pan.

(use clay, enamel, glass, plastic, or stainless steel. Stainless steel is the most common non-reactive cookware available. Since it does not conduct or retain heat well, it frequently has aluminum or copper bonded to the bottom or a core of aluminum between layers of stainless steel. Although expensive, this kind of cookware offers the benefits of a durable, non-reactive surface and rapid, uniform heat conductivity)

In other words, its well worth your money, go for it, live large like Jay-Z.
Like I was saying, place heavy cream into defined pan and add sugar. Split the vanilla bean down the middle and scrape out the luscious insides and add to pan as well ALONG with the vanilla bean itself. You want every penny you paid for a vanilla bean*
Heat the cream on medium-low heat just until the sugar has dissolved, in other words, don't let it boil.
In a large bowl whisk together the eggs and the egg yolks really, really well.
Once the sugar has dissolved in the cream, temper it into the eggs. (Temper means that you are bringing the temperature of the eggs up to the same temperature of the cream) Do this by pouring a small amount of the cream into the eggs while whisking at the same time, pour the rest of the cream into the eggs while whisking. Pour the mixture into a large liquid measuring cup through a sieve.
Place the molds you are using into a shallow baking dish and pour the cream mixture into the molds. Place the pan into the oven and very carefully pour hot tap water into the pan. Not the molds but the pan. This is called a water bath and this controls the heat to cook the egg mixture evenly so that the eggs will not curdle and separate. Curdled Creme Brulee is beyond bad. It looks like someone ralphed, would you want to eat that? I dare say no.
Baking time will be anywhere from 45 minutes to 1 1/2 hours, it really depends upon your oven. What you are looking for is the custard to shake like jello and you will know that it is done. If you shake it and it looks like liquid under the skin, let it cook longer. You will see a difference, I promise.
It will firm up in the fridge. You don't want the custards to brown or have any bubbles on top, that is a sign that you have let them cook to long. Once you take the pan out of the oven, let the water cool before taking the molds out of the pan, its just bad for everyone involved if you try to take them out of the very hot water. Creme Brulee should invoke memories and feelings of yumminess. Not scalding burning memories.
The creme brulee should be chilled at least overnight and can stay in your fridge for up to 2 days before brulee-ing and or eating.
Once they are chilled properly, give a light dusting of the brown sugar, tip it upside down and let any excess sugar fall out (preferably into another mold) You don't want too much sugar, it wont Brulee evenly. Using your kitchen torch, go over your creme brulees making sure to burn all of the sugar granules, you don't want any un-bruleed sugar on your creme.
A sign of a quality creme brulee is a cold custard and a crispy caramel topping.
Feel free to dig in right away or you can pop it back into the fridge for about 10 minutes
Enjoy!!

*Once you have poured the creme through a sieve, take your used vanilla bean, rinse it and let it dry out.
Once it is dried out, crumble it up and put it in a food processor with some granulated sugar about 1 to 2 cups, process it very well, till the vanilla bean is tiny, tiny, tiny along with the sugar. Store in an airtight container and make sure to LABEL it.
You can use this sugar in a lot of stuff! For instance, Creme Brulee, Pastry cream, cookies and cakes. Anything that calls for vanilla and sugar.
It's a damn good thing.

Where can I shove all this pastry cream?

2010-12-03T15:09:00.001-05:00

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I will tell you where you can shove all this pastry cream....
Right here, Banana cream pie for starters.
Watch and create here...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeNEbEL_RWI

Pie dough
2 cups ap flour
1 teaspoon salt
1/2cup cold shortening cut up into small pieces
1/4 cup cold butter cut up into small pieces
4 to 8 T ice cold water
blend flour and salt
Add butter and shortening to flour.
Mush up together with a pastry blender, till the mixture looks like small peas
Add 1/2 the water and distribute evenly through the pie dough. Add more water till dough is moist enough to hold together when pressed together.
At this stage its very important that you dont handle the dough too much. That will work up the gluten and make your pie dough stretchy and icky. Gluten good for bread, Gluten bad for pie dough.
Shape dough into a round disc and wrap with saran wrap, let chill for at least 1 hour or up to 2 days.

Roll out pie dough and place into pie tin. Then poke it all over with a fork as if the pie dough has offended you in some way or another. Then let chill for at least 30 minutes. (Are you getting that pie dough works best when cold and not over mixed? Good job)
Line pie dough with parchment paper (not wax, it will burn in the oven) then fill with beans or pie weights. This will force the pie dough to cook nice and flat and not bubble up.
Cook in a 375 degree oven for about 20 minutes. Remove parchment paper and weights, lower heat to 350 and bake about 5 minutes longer, or until golden brown.

Now, for the banana cream pie!
Rum, your choice. What do you like best? In my video I used Mt Gay, a little tribute to my gays. I also like Meyers Dark Rum.
Bananas, nice and ripe you can add 2 sliced up bananas or 4 sliced up bananas, whats your preference? You do you. I will do me and add 2 sliced up bananas.
Whipped cream, whipped up to firm peaks (thats my stage name, firm peaks)
Add rum to pastry cream to taste, fold in whipped cream and sliced up bananas to pastry cream.
Place in completely cooled pie crust. Top off with MORE unsweetend whipped cream
Let chill in fridge for at least 30 minutes

While my eyes and heart could make love to this entire pie, my ass begs me not to. So I have a slice and send the rest off with my gays. They deserve it, they are my gays after all...

This pie is great to make even if you don't have a dinner party. Now go make some damn pie &

let me know your results
Cheers!

Who doesn't want to be lectured on the finer points of pastry cream?

2010-11-21T21:38:00.000-05:00

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Pastry cream and its many, many uses

Watch here before, while and after you make your pasty cream
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g5H5wUUFFsI

Begin here with a recipe,
4 large eggs
4 large egg yolks
1 cup sugar
5 Tablespoons cake flour
4 Tablespoons cornstarch
4 cups whole milk
1 vanilla bean
4 Tablespoons butter cut up and kept cold

Slice the vanilla bean right down the middle and scrape out the luscious insides, add to milk.
Add sugar to milk in a large non-reacting sauce pan, heat over medium heat just till sugar has dissolved completely.
Whisk together the egg and egg yolks in one bowl
In another bowl, whisk together the cornstarch and cake flour, then add to eggs and whisk very, VERY well. Making sure there are NO clumps, at all, anywhere.
Once the sugar has dissolved completely into the milk (the milk does not REPEAT DOES NOT need to boil at this point just warm enough to dissolve all that sugar) temper the milk into the eggs by adding just about half of the milk and whisking at the same time. You want to bring the eggs up to the same temperature as the milk so that the eggs wont curdle. There is nothing good about curdled pastry cream. True story. Add the rest the milk to the eggs and whisk to combine.
Pour back into pan via way of a sieve, this will get out funky bits that would other wise end up into your pastry cream. Whisk constantly over med-high or med-low heat. It's up to your comfort level on this one, if this is your first time making pastry cream, go for the med-low heat, you will work your way up to med-high, I promise.
You have to whisk for a full 2 minutes while the pastry cream is boiling, this will cook out the starches and thickens up your pastry cream. You will know if you didn't boil it long enough if your pastry cream is runny and doesn't hold its shape. Once it has boiled for a full 2 minutes, transfer to a kitchen-aide bowl and using your paddle attachment (does paddle attachment sound naughty only to me? Give me a shout out if you are feeling me!) on medium speed paddle away, add the cold butter immediately. Now, walk away. Let it mix away, do it's thing. Let it mix for up to 10 minutes, lets live dangerously. Once the bottom of the bowl is cool to the touch, not warm AT ALL. Its done.
Store in an air tight container with saran wrap placed directly on top of the pastry cream before you put the lid on. Let chill for at least 3 hours or over night.

This can be the base for many, many, MANY yummy yummy desserts in your life.
Buh-ring it my friends

I cant even deal

2010-11-01T18:58:00.000-04:00

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Lanvin, Lanvin, Lanvin. That adorable, magnificent effin genius Alber Elbaz has always sent me over the edge of delerium with every piece he creates. I treat my Lanvin pieces as though they have magical powers, cuz really, they kinda do.
Anyhoo I was at Kirna Zabete last week for a soiree with Tracy Anderson (she has a kick ass chain of gyms that have such a high monthly fee, they have no doubt weeded out anyone resembling even a hint of middle class... peasants. Make no mistake, I will totally be a member of this gym one day...)
So there I was in all of my middle class glory at a Vogue covered soiree at one of the most high end shops in the world, when I saw this creation that no doubt, was made by angels. Angels at Lanvin.
I tried to control the sweating and drooling that was brought on by a purse. That's right, you heard (read) me correctly. I am talking about a purse, see below.

Mommy wants, Mommy needs....

Clothes and cake

2010-10-02T10:29:00.000-04:00

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There are fashion designers that make such insane gorgeous clothes, they traumatize me. Thats right, traumatize. I lose my breath, my heart speeds up and sometimes, I have pee'd a little in my pants.
You read that right.
While I would love to own all that I fall in love with, I dont have the closet space.... but thats being
worked on.... (in my dreams that is)
Fall 2010 was a sick year. Designers turned it the hell out and here you will find all that makes me drool.
This is from Balmain, the entire line is sick, by sick I mean true genius, there are not words to describe the vision and work gone into these pieces.
This heavenly ensemble here, Mommy wants, mommy wants real bad.
Let me share with you what else I see when I see this, a cake. The colors and textures would look gorgeous on a cake, I want to attempt this cake, with no fondant. Which would be a feat.
Christophe Decarnin is the visionary behind this and hey Christophe, dontcha think a really yummy cake would be a fair trade for this outfit?Gimme a call and lets chat.

Here is a piece from the last works of Alexander McQueen. His passing was a shock and great loss. Its in agreement that his skill and talent will forever go unmatched. This line looks as if he was making pieces for royalty. The colors, textures and workmanship send me to the E.R. Traumatized to the ninth degree. Cant. Even. Deal.
To me, this piece is just shouting out to be translated into a yummy frosting confection. Buh-ring it.
R.I.P Alexander McQueen

Now see (read) hear. I know, I know. Oscar is such an obvious choice. But CAN YOU EVEN DEAL?

I can count on half a hand how many places I have to wear such heavenly pieces...

Uhm, excuse me but Oscar CLEARLY had me in mind when creating these.

Now I am sure that some of you don't agree with my choices. To you I say, get a clue. Everything here is just mental. (As in so gorgeous, so beyond, it drives me mental, more then I usually am)
Anyhoo, this is my blog. If you dont like what I have picked to show you, do your own damn blog.

This last one is from that fierce gay, Christian Siriano (he won Project Runway on Bravo) This is one fierce gay that knows what the hell is up. This dress I need for next Tuesday. Cuz its next Tuesday...

Thats all

Curious, Fantasy, In control, Love at first Glow, Glow, Glow after dark

2010-09-30T17:33:00.003-04:00

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When I was in Jr High a couple of Celebrity endorsed eau du toilette (perfumes) hit the market. They were a big hit. While I didn't care for the perfume for the ladies, that Carrington really turned my ripe juvessence* hormones into overdrive. I really liked the smell of it. That Blake Carrington (that suave pimp from the t.v. series Dynasty) really knew how to make some fine smelling cologne. Krystal Carrington's perfume fell flat for my sense of smell. Sorry Krystal, no offense.
Fast Forward to present day.
To confirm that you are in fact a celebrity, you should be peddling at least 3 scents and for your "signature" scents you will need some really crappy names and an even crappier ad campaign.
I have a friend in the perfume biz and he enlightened me to the knowledge that most of the cost to make a perfume is the container and packaging. To make the actual perfume, pennies.
Celeb's have been quick to hitch their horses to this industry to make even more money then they already have. No, I am not bitter. But I do have a clue, to what is tasteful and if any of my friends hit the big time and wanted to jump on the perfume train, I would totally get in my friends face if they even thought of having an ad campaign look anything like this;

Does Mariah have no friends to tell her that this is not good?
Or this white hot tranny mess;

I could go on all day on how tacky this one is but its just too easy of a target...
So then we have this one;

Now I will give it to Mrs JLo that she is gorgeous. But holy hell, she is one talentless "entertainer"
I am not trying to say that I could do better then her. The difference is that I realize I am pretty talentless when it comes to acting, singing but I can tear up a dance floor. I therefore don't act or sing. Much to the happiness of those around me.

Oh but wait, not just Fancy.... Jessica also brings us...

Thats right! Fancy Nights!!!! I am sure with just a couple of dabs of this toilet water, you will no doubt need to buckle up, you are about to have a Fancy Night!!!
Again, does Jessica have no friends to say no, no Jessica, we will not let you name your perfumes Fancy and Fancy Night, because we love and care for you.

You can just smell the STD's jump off the page of this one,

I am sorry but I just couldnt help myself with this one. She named it Can Can cuz she does does everyone and everything....

I'm sorry the only thing this one knows how to "tease" would be an 8 ball of coke, right before she plastered her face up to that mirror and inhaled on it as if her life depended on it.

And oh yes, this is oh so Punk Rock...

I am sure if Sid and Nancy were still alive, Nancy would have no doubt woke up Christmas morning with this bottle of glorified Loves Baby Soft in her stocking hung by the fire, next to all the needles.

Please, if you have a famous friend and they are thinking about endorsing a perfume, keep it real and tell them if they look like a jackass.
They would do the same for you if you are true friends, true story.
* "Ripe juvessence" is borrowed from my most favorite movie, "Gentlemen Broncos"
Could you all do me a favor and watch it please so that I can quote and joke with you all?

Falling in love with fall, while never forgetting

2010-09-11T13:12:00.003-04:00

<$BlogMetaData$> Today is 9/11. I witnessed it in its entirety and now I live a few blocks away from Ground Zero. To this day I have reoccurring nightmares about it. I hope that all families & friends that lost loved ones have been able to find peace after such tragedy. My hope is that our country stays true to allowing freedom to practice religion without persecution while respecting loved ones grieving a loss that cannot be measured. 9/11 will forever be remembered and those lost will always be honored. Love & light to all Full disclosure here, I wrote this entry completely hungover, why I didn't wait till my head wasn't spinning is a blogger mystery... Please forgive if my writing is even more of a white hot mess then it usually is. Last night here in NYC and in cities all over the world all things fashion was celebrated with Fashion Night Out. It was started in an effort to boost lagging sales when our nations (& the world really) economy went straight to the crapper. (big thanks go to Reagan & Thatcher for that one) I had plans to hit 4 different places... That's not what went down. I ventured out with one of the most fun loving couples I know, Bill & Aimee. They are a party always at the ready, which I just luh-oooove! Aimee is 5 months pregnant and was rocking a sequined mini with 5 inch heels crafted by one of her fav's Roberto Cavalli. We had a couple of cosmo's (Bill & I) at their place & then ventured up to the cluster fugazi at 57th & 5th ave. There were crowds like I have never seen before at Bergdorf's & that I try to stay away from... We went across the street to Gilan for some champagne. Fashion gown genius Maggie Norris had collaborated with Gilan for last night & I was beyond thrilled to be in her company. Her gowns go for an upwards of $15,000.00 minimum. Worth. Every. Penny. Gilan was filled with a bunch of fabulous peeps & the majority of them were tossed out & a select few of us were asked to stay and have some champagne. I LOVE a closed luxury jewelry store serving champagne!!!! After throwing back several glasses of champagne we thought about moving on to other destinations but it was past the time that Fashion Night Out was due to end and most gorgeous pregnant Aimee was ready to move on to Da Silvano's, an eatery in the village that is a celeb cluster fuck, that also has the most amazing olive oil for dipping bread in and pasta that is really amazing. Most yummy try it if you get a chance. Fashion week starts this week here in NYC & I am lucky enough to hit a couple of shows that I will be sure to give a full report.

A quickie....

2010-08-26T09:46:00.000-04:00

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At this time every summer I look forward to crisp fall mornings, pumpkin picking, apple picking, hay rides and shopping for fall/winter clothes.
This season I plan on hitting TopShop, Zara and H&M. I have yet to try out these "fashion houses" that offer up fashions for all to afford. I will be the judge of that, for a couple of reasons. 1) I gew up very poor (not looking for anyone to cry me a river here, its just a fact. I will let you know what is considered "affordable") 2) I am complete slave to fashion and fancy myself as a fashionista that is "in the know"

I look forward to giving you my full report, look for this post coming mid-September.
Enjoy the rest of your summer, I myself, cannot wait to put the swimsuit away.......

Love for your home town.

2010-08-08T14:07:00.001-04:00

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Anyone that has ever met me knows that I am from Utah and no, I am not a Mormon. No offense to any Mormons. But anytime I am asked where I am from (living in NYC introductions follow up with the question where you are from as few people are actually from NYC) when I give my answer that I am from Utah without my immediate response that no I am not a Mormon, people will without fail ask if I am Mormon or how many sister wives live in my household.
I left the beehive state www.Utah.com/ in 1993 and have lived in NYC ever since. I make regular trips back to the land of milk and honey and every time I fall more in love with it. The mountains are gorgeous, the horizon goes on forever and it only takes a 15 - 20 minute drive from anywhere in Salt Lake City to feel like you have really "gotten away from it all". All four seasons offer up fun things to do, winter being the obvious season. Summer here is wonderful. The mountains bloom some of the most beautiful flowers, the night sky is so clear you can see satellites flying by and shooting stars are commonplace. My favorite is to stay up at Stein Erikson Lodge and indulge in everything that place has to offer. I feel like I am on a vacation while on a vacation whenever I stay up there. Although I wont lie, a St Regis recently opened up with a Jean-Georges restaurant, this could change everything...
Anyhoo, as usual, I digress. While this is somewhat of a love letter about Utah, I walk around here in a constant state of WTF? in regards to fashion and hair choices here. For more then a few years now, women here (not all but a large majority) style their hair with the now famous by way of Snooki of The Jersey Shore, hair bump. It's a hair accessory perched underneath some hair on the back of their hair to make it look "Fancy" I guess and quite honestly, it looks to me as though they are trying to cover up some sort of tumor or crazy large growth on the back of their head. Add to that the frosted chunks of hair placed sporadically throughout their hair. WTF? Getting one's hair colored should be to compliment what you already have, not look like a blind colorist got a hold of you to try out what they are sure to be the next latest hair fad. The only women able to pull off changing her hair color often and drastically is Linda Evangelista. Know your assests and work with them not against them. Blending, blending is the secret.
Which brings me to my next WTF? A large majority (not all of them) of women dress like adult film stars to go out to bars here. Now I am sure that many men are ok with this but really, do you want to end up with a man like that? No offense porn loving men.
The loads of make up that has obviously been spackled on with a spoon, the hair, the clothes or the lack there of, it's too much, like you're trying too hard. (and for what is a good question)
Remember, I live in NYC. Anything goes, crazy reigns supreme here and I LOVE it.
One night at a club here in the SLC, girls where wearing spray paint for their choice of shirts. Big time WTF? There is a time and a place to wear paint on your body in place of clothes see link below
http://inappropriatebunny.com/abbey-clancy-painted-on-swimsuit-for-sports-illustrated/
Here paint on your body works although I cant imagine the kind of waxing that went on for that look.
At a club, looking to get your groove on, believe it or not leaving room to the imagination can go a long way.
Color me nutty but dressing half naked is on many levels the easy and obvious choice. Show some thought, let your clothes tell people who you are. They don't have to be high end designer labels (but sweet love of Buddha, I do have expensive taste) they should fit you well and you should be comfortable.Think of your body as your picture frame (I have got to tone up my picture frame...) and your clothes as your art expressing and showing people who you are. It doesn't matter what your style is because nothing is "in style" anymore, everything is in style. As long as you own who you are.
On to bags of choice out here. The painfully obvious knock off Coach, Louis Vuitton, Gucci, Fendi, Chanel, etc you get the drift, needs to come to a screeching halt.
First off, most counterfeit bags are made by enslaved children see http://www.stylestring.com/?p=2286
Do you really need a knock off that bad?
B) Your bag should compliment you, your bag shouldn't be wearing you. If you cant afford a high end designer bag, buy a cute no namer you can afford while you save up for the real thing. Or head over to www.bagborroworsteal.com and rent whatever label bag you want.
Buying designer labels online is risky unless you are buying from the original website. Most of, if not all, online places that offer discount designer shoes or handbags are counterfeit. If you ever purchased a pair of Christian Louboutin's online and when the package came it is post marked from China, you no doubt are the owner of some knock off's.
I am always the first one to recognize that I am a slave to fashion (by that I mean I appreciate Valentino, Oscar de la Renta, Prada and of course Chanel, as more then people who make clothes, they are true artists. I also appreciate a cute outfit from H&M) I would never, ever knowingly purchase a product that is funding human trafficking and child enslavement.
Next time you or someone you know comes to the big apple and goes in search of some knock off bags, maybe think twice about purchasing something that has to be done down a back alley or in a van out of sight.
A person can look way more stylish with a bag from The Gap rather then carrying a knock off. It's the person you want people to notice not what you have on your arm.

To girls here in Utah that frequent the club The Hotel, you're all pretty. Put on some damn clothes and take off some of that make up. Ah mah gawd, am I a grown up now????????

The Jersey Shore and diet coke

2010-07-25T21:49:00.007-04:00

This summer has been one of my favorite. Its been filled with family, great friends, gorgeous beaches and of course yummy food and summer fashions. (those damn short shorts are going no where and I finally grasp what EXACTLY diet coke does no matter how beyond perfect it tastes)

Our summer started off with a vacation in Aruba (which has become one of our favorite destinations) followed by a fun-filled stay at Long Beach Island (GORGEOUS!) we saw Moon jelly-fish, so so cool! A visit to some friends in East Hampton, fun as always, and we just got back from the Joisey shore. I say that with all due respect to the Jersey shore.
While there were no sightings of The Situation or Snooki, it lived up to the legend. We went out to a club Friday night and a bunch of post-menopausal tanorexic women with way too much jewelry on, were very busy getting their groove-thing on with a pole that no doubt, more then likely has one or more STD's. I had a hard time not watching the complete train wreck that was dancing around that poor pole as if it was a late night cinemax Mayfair celebration. I was looking around the club to try and look as though I was not looking at the menopausal pole celebration non-stop, I caught sight of two of my Aunts!!
Well, they could have been anybody's Aunts. These 2 older women sitting at the bar drinking what looked like must of have been the last drink of their lives based on their less then happy to be where they were looks on their faces. But then, alas! A song from 1993 from that musical wizardy artist Robin S. "You got to show me love" was put on by the dj and good times and dancing commenced! They even went so far as to get off their bar stools and shift their weight from foot to foot while raising and lowering their arms in opposite directions, this would be, I believe to be dancing.
Well that was at least my interpretation of what they were doing with their bodies. I say they could have been anyone's Aunt because they both had that hair do that is feathered all over on the top with a cascading mane of perm curls falling down to their shoulders (a hair-do I am most certain at least one of my aunts has sported her entire life and still wears it proudly) I am certain they were both wearing different versions of the wolf shirt.
Please click the link below to witness the power of the wolf shirt;
http://www.amazon.com/Mountain-Three-Wolf-Short-Sleeve/product-reviews/B002HJ377A/ref=cm_cr_pr_link_next_2?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=0&pageNumber=2

A shout out must be made to a restaurant in Asbury Park, NJ. To Langosta Lounge, I declare my love. ( http://langostalounge.com/)
I would travel to Asbury Park JUST to go to this place to eat. If you do go their and really everyone should go at least once, for all that is good and holy, ORDER the corn on the cob. Don't question me, I will never steer you wrong when it comes to food. This corn is quite possibly made by angels. Every time I watch "Nacho Libre" my craving for this corn will shoot through the roof.
After this culinary magical feast my high was brought down by a discussion of the truth about my beloved diet coke. My friend that I was with this weekend works in the medical field and while we were enjoying a cold refreshing bottle of phosphoric acid aka diet coke, she gave me a edumaction on what your body does after you drink a diet coke. FYI, I drink about 2 cans of diet coke a day, FYI, 2 cans of diet coke equals 4 servings, bitches.
When I got home today I got online and looked up some studies on Diet Coke, so sad. Although I will no longer be buying diet coke to keep in my fridge, I will still drink diet coke when I go out to eat. Baby steps people, baby steps.
With my mantra being that of "If you want to have something sweet and yummy, have it. Just not everyday. Rather have 1 real brownie a week then a treat every day filled with fake sweetners"
It's important that I practice what I preach, so here I go.
May the force be with me. The force of a small pony....

2010-07-06T12:38:00.003-04:00

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Well let me tell you all something, I had a great week last week. It was filled with food and fashion. As you all know (all 28 of you...) Food and fashion are both on the top of my all time favorite things ever in this world list. As this list is ever changing for me, these 2 things will never change.

If I could just find some way to harness the power of that ever mighty star the sun and channel it into my own use so that I would not gain any weight while eating my favorite foods while wearing some killer fashion at the same time, that would be my nirvana my friends, ohhhhh yes, that's what mommy is talking about. But I digress (as usual)

The first event I went off to was a food show, well it shouldn't really be called a food show, it's more like a cocktail party (anything can be a cocktail party if you try hard enough) where about 35 food purveyors show off their goods to various professionals (such as myself) in the biz. Its put on by the genius over at www.FoodFete.com. I got the chance to sample everything from chocolate covered figs to bacon and pizza soda, no lie. Funny enough I kept finding myself over at the vodka table making sure that I really, really liked the strawberry lemonade vodka cocktails. Turns out, I really did like those drinks.

One of my favorite tables was the Trudeau spot, they have so many cool gadgets in which I had no idea that needed all of them! Check out www.Trudeaucorp.com to quickly figure out what your life is missing.

Over at the Jones soda table (www.jonessoda.com) I tried their limited edition pizza and bacon flavored soda's. Please dont make me explain why those flavors are limited edition. I realize that bacon has a cult following and I am down with bacon, but keep it out of my soda and chocolate. The levels of wrong are many. Jones soda does make plenty of very yummy flavors and you can custom order your very own labeled soda to give as party invites or as party favors. I would much prefer a yummy bottle of black cherry soda over a candle with your wedding date on it. No offense candle favors.

My week ended with a little soiree up at the Isaac Mizrahi store on the upper east side, good thing I just got my passport renewed. Friends of Fashion (check them out at www.friendsoffashion.com) had somewhat of a tea party with Isaac in attendance. I have a goal to get him into my circle of gays, he would be a great gay to have in my life*
*To all my other gays, you're all pretty and mommy loves you very much, Shelby, drink your juice. To anyone reading this that finds themselves offended at my comments above, no gay were hurt in the making of this post.
Back to Isaac, he was showing a preview of some of his fall 2010 collection and oh yummy! I was checking out some of his amazing work with evening gowns trying not to drool all over myself when one of the sales associates asked me if I wear evening gowns very often. I told her being a stay-at-home mom/pastry chef, I usually wear my evening gowns on Tuesday evenings no matter what...
Look out PETA, Isaac has some fur stoles that he cleverly put in some bejeweled feet and heads of a fox and a bear peeking out from underneath the fur. I think its way clever and will do what I have to do to get one for this fall/winer season. Now, its ok if I buy one because I dont eat chicken. (This is a life lesson I learned from that thinktank we all know and love Kelly Bensimon)
In this gal's opinion and remember, I lose focus if its not about me, Isaac know's what the hell he is doing. He is one of those designers that has the ability to make some seriously pretty clothes that are comfortable and make you feel like a pretty pretty princess.
Mizrahi’s overall aesthetic is feminine and ladylike—appropriate for the spot’s Upper East Side locale—but look for unexpected twists in color and detailing
And look for me wearing my evening gowns every Tuesday...

http://www.isaacmizrahiny.com/collections/isaac_mizrahi_new_york_-_women/81/womens__fall_2010/albums/101/womens_fall_2010_slide_show

Screw those short shorts, lets talk about cake!

2010-06-21T21:07:00.004-04:00

As I have mentioned before, the days of yore were really good days for cake. Remember when we were younger and looked forward to those yummy birthday cakes that were more then likely purchased at your neighborhood grocery store? Going to the store and just looking at the cakes behind the glass case would get your senses wound up into such a tizzy that you would have to hold back the drool about to drip out of your mouth at the sight of all that yummy frosting mounded up in the shape of a clown with some plastic clown face stuck on top of it. Pure culinary genius at work here at Albertson's bakery counter...

This cake was for my friend's daughter whom I refer to as "cupcake" because she is as delicious and cute as a cupcake. She told me she wanted a doll cake with strawberries. I made the strawberries out of the fondant I got from Chef Duff's launch party to promote his new line of cake goods. The cake is filled with vanilla cake, vanilla frosting and homemade strawberry jam. Yuh-ummy!

I know that I am not the only one who craves for the cakes back in the days of yore (before any of us knew that Crisco is the bi-product of Satan's love making, "My chicken has been soaking in it for hours while I have been on the worlds longest phone call while my family withers away from hunger!" Whomever is reading this and can reference this gets some cake...)

At any rate, I make about 3 - 4 cakes a week for various clients and the most requested flavor I get is vanilla and chocolate cake with vanilla and chocolate frosting, alternating layers. Classic "days of yore" flavor mixing. If the cake is for a girl the most requested way to decorate it is with a Barbie doll while the cake and the frosting make the dress.

I took one of the "glass (plastic) slippers" from the doll and placed it on a pillow made out of frosting, its on that little blue square to the side

Cutting these cakes makes for a challenge only because I don't care for the plastic dolls that are made specifically for doll cakes because they look like cheap little whores, well ok, maybe just cheap. So I purchase whichever Barbie will work best for the cake at hand and proceed to rip off one of her legs, wrap the other leg in saran wrap and warn the client that underneath the pretty doll cake lies a Barbie from a war-torn country who has suffered the sad loss of losing one of her legs while defending her Barbie castle from an oppressive war-lord dictatorship lead by a rogue band of Bratz dolls.

Bon Apetit!

Tasty fondant, isn't that an oxymoron?

2010-06-06T17:22:00.000-04:00

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I have to apologize...
I have been very neglectful to Sugarlovingfashionista as of late. I've been going through some "life experiences" (I'll call it that to be decent and not sound like the foul mouthed Sailor you all know and love) that have closely mirrored almost every episode of "The 'Real' Housewives of NYC".
As soon as I find a way to write about these shenanigans that I can frame with my sarcastic humor I will post it for you all, my faithful 24 followers, to read and enjoy.
In the meantime; I was invited to a launch party of cake decorating supplies developed with and endorsed by Chef Duff, the cake decorator we all know and love on TVFN's "Ace of Cakes"

I have been making cakes for 20 years now and I by no means try to align myself with the likes of Chef Duff. (Cuz in my possibly medicated washed down with alcohol world, I'm even better then Duff) When I first started out making cakes I used Wilton as my bible and that gave me a great base in cake decorating. Along the way (the way being The French Culinary Institute, Le Cirque and Colette Peters) I have had the great fortune to learn from the best in the industry. I learned how to use fondant (fondant is that sugar paste that resembles play-dough that covers cakes and allows a world full of opportunity in decorating a cakes, it also tastes very similar to play-dough) make sugar-paste flowers, fill cakes with various flavors of mousse along with various flavors of ganache and buttercream. I've come full circle and have found myself back to the basics in decorating and flavors. Oh yes, that's right kiddies, the tide is a changing and mommy is surfing this wave. I have found that most people want their cakes to taste reminiscent to cakes back in the day's of yore.
Back in the days of yore were good days for cake.
The most popular cake flavor I get requests for is chocolate cake and chocolate frosting with alternating layers of vanilla cake with vanilla frosting. I stay very far, far, FAR away from fondant. It tastes like ass (well I am assuming it tastes like ass, I don't make it a practice to go around tasting ass) People have VERY strong feelings about fondant. Customers hate the taste, yet cake decoraters (including this one) love it for the freedom it allows for in decorating cakes.
So last Thursday I ventured over to Chef Duff's launch party to try out his cake decorating products. There were some crazy claims of good tasting fondant, which made me really and truly laugh out loud. Puh-shaw I say! Good tasting fondant, as if. Next there will be claims that my beloved Foie Gras is being made fat free, anarchy!!! I walked in to this launch party ready to hate the fondant and meet TV personality and cake artist extrodinare, Duff. In that order.
The launch party was great, there were 6 inch round cakes filled and ready to go for everyone attending to decorate their own cake. The space was set up in the same style as if it were a culinary school. I planted myself front and center and started to decorate when I noticed there were waiters walking around with glasses of champagne and I LOVE waiters walking around with glasses of champagne! Excellent way to go launch party!
I didnt get a chance to use all of the cake decorating offerings but I did enjoy what I ended up using. Fondant. Yup, that's right. The devils work. Satan's sugar lump. Fondant has the tendency to dry out pretty fast so time is of the essence when using it. Duff's fondant was hard as a brick upon opening the container. After a small visit to the microwave, it was soft and perfectly pliable. I began to roll out the fondant to cover my cake when I was forced by one of the peeps running this show to taste the fondant. I felt like I was on "Fear Factor" with no reward in sight after successfully eating a slug.
I took a breath and prepared myself for the challenge before me. I have to admit, it wasn't that bad. The taste is very similar to candy corn, which I do enjoy and it was really easy to roll it as thin as possible.
In this master bakers opinion the best quality to this fondant was that it does not easily dry out and its very forgiving. As I was making purple balls (nothing says I'm learning new mad skills while having wicked fun like purple balls) I had left the fondant out on purpose to see how long it would take to dry out. As you can see in the pictures, I made a lot of purple balls. I didn't really have a plan in how I was going to decorate the cake. I was just making it up as I went along, as you may have noticed...

As the champagne started to settle into my blood stream, my already low filter started to disappear and I wrote a little message on my cake... I don't think that Chef Duff appreciated it...

No harm no foul? Chef Duff?
Meeting Duff was a blast, he was super friendly, even to the crazy blonde girl who suggested he could suck it on the cake provided by him to decorate. Duff, next time you are in NYC, I am getting the first 4 rounds of drinks, you dig?

With the world of cakes exploding with popularity, there is a need for the home baker to have easy access to the supplies needed to make cakes at home. The launch of Duff's products will fill that need as his cake decorating supplies will be found at local grocery and craft stores and of course, his website www.duff.com
For us that live here in NYC, there is the mecca, New York Cake and Bake. It is filled to the gills with everything from cake decorating to candy making. Don't go there thinking you will have any of your questions happily answered by a helpful staff. The staff there is usually pretty annoyed at just about anything and everything. My personal favorite is the guy who stands at the counter yelling "Next! Next! Next!" as I look around the empty store looking for the customers whom he is bellowing at only to realize I am the only customer in there. Makes for such a fun shopping experience.

All in all I really did enjoy using Duff's products, I am going to make a cake using all of his supplies and give it a "tested in my apartment" review.

Now a preview of my next post, summer fashion. Really short shorts? Really? You just have to be THAT short? Flippin hell

Fun, food and fashion... Disney style

2010-05-12T14:07:00.003-04:00

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Cankles, screaming kids on leashes, "themed" clothing and accessories, entire families on scooters and 60 oz 7000 calories alcoholic frozen drinks.
These were my first observations the morning we went aboard The Disney Cruise. Things only got better from there...
For our vacation this spring we decided to go on The Disney Cruise and because we are complete sadists, we journeyed over to Disney World upon disembarking the happiest boat on the seven seas.
Our daughter is 6 years old and we are starting to see the signs of her enter into a world of adolescence that realizes that Santa Clause, The Tooth Fairy are more of an idea and that the Mickey and Minnie Mouse characters that she see's on the cruise and at Disney World are really just people in costumes.
I, however full on still believe in fairies, Princesses, and if your heart is pure and full of love, Pixie dust will really make you fly over London late at night. (or maybe that's from all my past recreational drug use?)
With that said, we wanted to take our daughter to Disney while there is still some mystical magic in it for her.
There is something to be said to watch a child's eyes light up at the sight of their beloved character in front of them with out reached arms waiting for a hug from them. Our daughters feet didn't touch the ground through the entire vacation she was having so much fun. Me and my husband loved watching her have so much fun.
We lucked out in MANY, MANY ways with our daughter. One of those ways is that she has no desire to stand in line and have her photo taken with the various Disney characters. She is perfectly happy to do a walk by on her way to the swimming pool. Rock and mother flippin Roll.

Living in NYC and being a chef, we are very aware at how spoiled we are when it comes to food. We resigned to the fact that the food would be mediocre at best. It wasn't even mediocre on the cruise. It sucked, it sucked bad. I know, I should be a food writer...
The service and the staff on the happiest boat on the seven seas is wonderful. Seriously, the employees really make you feel as though your happiness is all they care about and that really works well for me. There weren't too many people on that boat that I would care if they were happy or not. The parenting skills by one mother in particular just blew me away. First off said mother was in a Baby Phat bikini and her daughter was in a MATCHING bikini. My retina's still have not recovered fully from the burn incurred from the bright Bahama sun reflecting off the bling and piercing my eyes with a lightening rod of bad taste.
This fashion plate of a mother was yelling at her daughter for all to hear how she needed to "talk nice" or else she was gonna get it. Great example Baby Phat mom. Oh the back ground sounds of vacation.

The cruise took us to the Bahamas where we swam with Dolphins. Truly amazing and the highlight of our daughters vacation. Then we sailed off to Disneys private island, Castaway Cay. Of course Disney has its own private island! I would be surprised if Disney DIDN'T have a private island. At Castaway Cay we frolicked on the beach all day long. Because we cant get our daughter out of the ocean once she is in it. She is a beach baby all the way. With the color she got she now looks like a little piece of caramel. Castaway Cay is great, you dont have to go through customs (if any of you reading this have gone through customs in the Caribbean, you feel my pain) You just walk off the boat and over to the beach. On your way over, you see the haunted ship used in the movie "Pirates of the Caribbean" perched close to the beach. Makes for a great photo op that none of us went for.
After all that magic we sailed back to the mainland (Florida for you land lovers) and made our way over to Disney World.
We immediately checked in to our hotel and went over the Magic Kingdom. Running from ride to ride I noticed something. The inspiration of Wall-E was found at the Magic Kingdom. No kidding. We saw entire families on scooters and or wheel chairs and 8-9-10 year olds in strollers. Usually eating and drinking something.
It is really hot and there is a lot of walking but really, maybe some physical training before you go to an amusement park where you have to walk around to stand in line for 30 minutes for a 2 1/2 minute ride. If you have to use a scooter because you get winded going from one ride to another maybe re-think your vacation destination.

All in all we had a great time and the people watching alone is worth going to Disney. The celestial white sneakers reflecting off of the hot Florida sun that 90% of the guests wear while at Disney can give you a 3rd degree sun burn so double up on the sun screen.

2010-04-25T09:22:00.000-04:00

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This past week I was contacted by the super nice people who run http://www.tribecacitizen.com/ (an online newsletter about all things Tribeca) to do the Q & A section about living in Tribeca. I had a blast answering the questions. As most things in life, I try not to take too many things too seriously, it takes too much energy. Am I using the word "too" correctly and or too much here? Lets move on.

I grew up in Utah on the wrong side of the tracks. Belive it or not, even Utah has the wrong side of the tracks. Sometimes people cant imagine that the land of milk and honey has any areas void of any milk and honey. Well it does and I grew up in those parts.

So imagine if you will, coming from the side of the tracks that are devoid of any milk or honey, to the land that over runnuth milk and honey. Its a bit mind blowing. Good thing I am always down to have my mind blown....

The contrasts are great and many from where I came from to where I am now (for instance, the amount of shoes I have, that is a whole other post that is in the near future) I wouldn't change a thing about my beginings (or the middle for that matter) and I love everyday of this thing called life. (Dawni, that one is for you)

Anyhoo, check out my Q & A at www.tribecacitizen.com/2010/04/22/the-tcqa-roc-is-like-the-cheers-of-tribeca-and-i-think-i-might-be-norm-except-i-dance-on-tables/

Watch for my posts coming to live this week from the Disney cruise, I am sure there will be more then enough "fashions" to discuss and ponder

Peace out bitches

An ode to cereal...

2010-04-19T17:01:00.000-04:00

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I love cereal. I mean I really, REALLY LOVE cereal. I could happily eat it for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Only problem is that unless you are eating a bowl of straight up horse food (steel cut oats, grains, hay and alfalfa) cereal is nothing more then just a big box of sugar cleverly disguised with claims all over the brightly, fun colored box that it is "enriched with vitamins and made from the goodness whole grains"
Well crystal meth could also easily be enriched with whole grains and vitamins, that doesn't make crystal meth any better for your health.
I broke my cereal habit back in 1994. (Thank you Jesus*) Now that I am a mother to the coolest 6 year old rock and roll star of a girl, I want to raise her with good eating habits. Not to sound all brown rice and Birkenstock here (not that there is anything wrong with either of those 2 items...) but cereal is only allowed while we are on vacation. I tell my daughter that it will make her body weak and unhealthy if she was to eat it on a regular basis. Cuz, its the truth.
An example of how very cool my daughter is, one hot day here in NYC we stopped into a deli to grab something cold to drink and there in the deli's cooler was Boylans Black Cherry Soda, yuh-hummy! I grabbed a bottle for me and my daughter to share and she loved it just as much as I do. She asked why we didn't have this drink sent down from the heavens more often? I explained that this drink isn't a drink we should have all of the time because it will make our bodies unhealthy and weak. To which my daughter looked at me and looked at the bottle of cherry soda and threw the rest of it away. There was at least 3/4 still full. I love this girl!!! I explained that we were just having it as a treat and she told me that she would like some ice cold water instead. I could call her The Fonz she is so damn cool.

Our daughter does little league baseball, swimming, dance, yoga** and she just asked if we would enroll her in Kung-Fu classes. She said that Kung-Fu will make her even stronger and healthier and she is Japanese, so she really SHOULD be in a Kung-Fu class. Like I said/wrote earlier, she is a mother flipping rock star.

In my opinion, cereal factories are obviously run by a bunch of pot-heads. (takes one to know one...) I mean, just take a look at any of those cereal boxes, it is pretty easy to tell that someone was tripping up in the clouds while at "work" at the cereal factory.
Cereal should be meant for a sugary treat, something to eat at a slumber party or sneaked into a movie theater instead of eating the $20.00 popcorn and candy. So instead of adding milk as suggested for a balanced part of a nutritious breakfast, I added marshmallow, butter and chocolate. As it was meant to be.
For you, all 19 of my followers, I went out and bought 3 boxes of cereal to show the real purpose of cereal. That's right, cereal while NOT on vacation. I will do anything for my readers. The proof is in the pudding.
I made Muddy Buddies with Rice Chex cereal. NYC S'mores with Golden Grahams and of course, Rice Krispy treats. Below are the recipes with my tips included to making them even yummier then the recipes on those psychadelic cereal boxes.

Muddy Buddies
In a microwave safe bowl, add 1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips, 1/2 cup creamy peanut butter, 1/4 cup butter (NEVER margarine, that's not even a real food product) Heat in microwave uncovered for 1 minute, take out and stir. It should be creamy and no lumps. If all of the chocolate hasn't melted, put it back in for 30 seconds or till its all melted and smooth. Its always better to heat it up for a shorter amount of time and put in longer as needed then a longer of amount of time and burning it. It can happen and its not fun.
Once its all melted, creamy and smooth add 1 teaspoon of vanilla. Then add 6 cups of Rice Chex cereal. Stir this big mess up till its well combined.
Then in a 1 gallon ziplock bag, add 2 cups of powdered sugar to that, add the cereal that has been invaded by peanut butter and chocolate madness and shake, shake, shake. I refuse to make any disco jokes here as I HATE disco, uck.
Place the ziplock bag in the fridge for at least 1 hour. You have just made fat bombs. Enjoy

Just look at all of these vitamin enriched treats...

NYC S'mores

In a microwave safe bowl, add 1 bag big marshmallows and 1/4 cup butter (NEVER margarine! Its not a real food product!) Heat for 1 minute or till marshmallows have become soft enough that they deflate into a yummy pile of goo while you stir it. Add 6 cups of Golden Grahams along with half of a bag of mini-marshmallows stir till well combined and press into a buttered 9 x 13 baking dish. It will be pretty sticky so it helps to butter up your washed hands to press into the dish. Chill in fridge for 1 hour
Melt 1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips and drizzle over. Cut into desired shapes and sizes. Let your imagination run wild with it!

Rice Krispy treats

In a microwave safe bowl add 1 bag of big marshmallows and 4 Tablespoons of butter (remember, never margarine) Heat for 1 minute (same as above NYC S'mores instructions) add 4 1/2 cups Rice Krispies and 1/2 bag mini marshmallows, stir till well combined. Press with clean, buttered hands into a 9 x 13 baking dish. Let cool to room temp or chill in the fridge.

Here are some of my pot-head tips for maximum enjoyment of these "vitamin enriched and made from whole grain goodness treats"
First off, you are in charge, not the recipe. If you feel you want to add more marshmallow or add less cereal or vice versa, go ahead. You are the boss. The measurements of ingredients are more of a guide then a precise science. If you want to add more peanut butter or less chocolate, go ahead. This should be fun and not a hassle. If cooking is a pain in the ass then you are really doing something wrong. Step away from the kitchen, take a breather, have a little drink, do some yoga, do whatever you need to do to feel positive or irie.
Now go make some whole grain goodness and report back to me

* "Thank you Jesus" is a quote from the movie "Fun with Dick and Jane" When Jim Carreys character goes to apply for a job at a Costco type place and the manager interviewing him asks him to pee in a cup for drug testing and comedy ensues. The term "Thank you Jesus" does not necessarily reflect my views or beliefs, I was just making a funny.
** All activites that my super cool daughter participates in she has asked for, we are not activity crazed parents. We are crazy but in a good way and I have a Doctors note to prove it.

Sugar loving fashionista: I will tell you what I will pay to eat lunch with Ruth Reichl....

2010-04-08T21:47:00.000-04:00

Sugar loving fashionista: I will tell you what I will pay to eat lunch with Ruth Reichl.... <$BlogMetaData$>

I will tell you what I will pay to eat lunch with Ruth Reichl....

2010-04-08T21:17:00.006-04:00

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Well the people over at Charitybuzz doGOOD liveWELL (www.charitybuzz.com) are auctioning off a lunch with the lovely and most food knowledgeable, Ruth Reichl.
Lunch with Ruth is really, well, priceless. I read 2 of her books, "Comfort me with Apples" and "Tender at the Bone" and after visiting her website, I see I have 2 more to read ("Not becoming my Mother" that sounds like a book a lot of us can relate too & "Garlic and Sapphires" Garlic, love, Sapphires, love, obviously this is a great book as well) The trouble with reading Ruth's books is that you remain in a constant state of hungry. Well, maybe hungry isn't the correct word, more like you are constantly salivating. She writes about food and life so beautifully. I really don't think she can be compared to anyone, she is in a class by herself.

I was in a class by myself but that is because I swear like a sailor. I apologize but sometimes (well a lot of times for me...) there is no other word like the word fuck to get your point across. I was discussing this with my childhood crush and good friend, Chris and he brought up a point that I really fucking agree with. Using the word fuck is often the easy way out and show's one's lack of intelligence in using it a great deal. Well Chris, as you well know, I am really fucking easy and I am fucking intelligent enough*
But I fucking digress...

What ever you read by Ruth you find yourself wanting to know more about food. She makes you want to get yourself to the nearest greenmarket and work with ingredients you have never used before to make a dinner for you and your loved ones that will blow them all away. True story

I have never had the opportunity to meet Ruth although I have been to some of the same events as her, so really its like we are bff's. Trust me after reading anything she wrote, you will feel like you are one of her best friends. She writes in a way that makes you feel as though she is talking only to you and that you are the only person that matters. Which is great because I often get confused and disorientated when it's not about me.

Now do yourself a favor and go and get one of her fucking books, you will fucking love it. You will want to definitely bid on this wonderful lunch opportunity. If you aren't able to bid on the lunch, no worries. I will and I can gladly fill in. Ruth Reichl - Paulette Goto, same thing really
Peace out bitches

*I consider myself intelligent enough to get through the day but I am always looking to learn something new. That is why I am getting an edumaction at Sarah Lawrence.
True story

http://www.ruthreichl.com
http://www.charitybuzz.com/catalog_items/112504
http://www.maniacworld.com/f-81.htm

A shirt and a dessert, a shizzert!!

2010-04-02T02:54:00.002-04:00

For the last couple of weeks, I felt as though my life was trapped in a horrible episode of "The Real Housewives of New York" Since there is nothing real or anything remotely close to a "housewife" on that show, I really felt as though I was having an out of body experience floating around in a cloud disbelief watching some insane, very unreal(ity) events unfolding before my eyes.

(But really, aren't all of the episodes of "The Real Housewives" horrible? Other wise, why would any of us watch it? Its a train wreck of wonderfulness entertainment that I am completely hooked on like a hopeless whacked crack addict.)

Meanwhile, I was browsing around on the interweb checking out some spring time fashion when I was suddenly slapped back into feeling like myself again, you'll never guess what did this to me. A shirt. Oh that's right. A shirt so mother flippin perfect and beautiful and so CLEARLY made just for me. I mean seriously, this shirt was made with me in mind of the creator, Oscar de la Renta. You heard (read) me right, Oscar so obviously has me in mind for many of his fashions. So to thank and honor Oscar for making a shirt just for me, I thought it would only be fitting that I create a dessert inspired by his most beautiful shirt, hence my shizzert! What I came up with is my version of the classic Pavlova dessert.

(Anna Pavlova was a famous ballerina and word on the street is that this dessert was made in her honor with the meringue meant to represent her tutu.)

I filled my (well Oscars really) pavlova with lightened* passion fruit curd, topped with sliced banana's, white chocolate shavings and finally sprinkled with powdered sugar.

(*In the wonderful world of Pastry the term "lighten" is used when whipped cream is added to something such as pastry cream or fruit curds to lighten up the taste and texture. If only adding whipped cream to my thighs would lighten them up...)

So join me wont you? Join me on my journey to make a shizzert. A shizzert so grand and filled with such passion that you will feel compelled to make it and share it with a loved one. Since Oscar was busy and I couldn't track him down (pesky restraining order anyway) I shared mine with my daughter and husband, and neighbors and doorman. Cuz its all about sharing the wealth.... Oscar....

To start, preheat the oven to 300 degrees. Then separate the whites from the yolks from 4 eggs and let the whites come to room temperature and put the yolks back in the fridge to be used for the passion fruit curd later. Split a vanilla bean down the middle and scrape out the insides and put into the egg whites. Begin to whip (with a handheld mixer or my favorite a Kitchen Aide) beat till frothy and slowly start to add 1 cup of granulated sugar and 1 Tablespoon of CornStarch and a pinch of salt until stiff peaks and glossy. Spread some of the meringue about 1 inch thick in about a 9 inch round. Some people may think this is too big, to them I say, swing for the fences.

My 1 inch thick 9 inch round disc of meringue goodness,

oh mommy likes

Oh mommy likes

Next fill a pastry bag with the rest of the meringue and pipe yummy fluffy columns on top of the base all around,

Do you see how this shirt forced me to make this dessert? It was the right thing to do and the tasty way to do it.

Here is a side view before I baked it, its so pretty and practically begging for lightened* passion fruit curd to be lovingly dolloped smack in the middle. (only fill it once it is baked, eating raw egg whites really ups the ante in your chance of getting salmonella)

Bake in the oven for 1 hour, turn off the oven but leave the meringue in the oven for 1/2 hour. The meringue should feel crispy on the outside yet it will be slightly moist on the inside with specks of vanilla bean playing peek-a-boo. Be very, very careful when gently caressing the meringue to check for proper firmness, you may feel the very strong urge to rip part of it off and eat it right away.

Now get those egg yolks out of the fridge, put them in a saucepan and begin making the passion fruit curd. If living like this is wrong, I don't wanna live right. Add 1/4 cup of passion fruit puree and 3/4 cup granulated sugar to the egg yolks and whisk immediately till well combined (granulated sugar cooks egg yolks and if you don't mix it well, it can screw everything up, crazy huh?) cook over low to medium heat and don't stop stirring! (use a wooden spoon) Scrape the sides down in between stirring, keep this up till it gets thick enough to coat the back of the wooden spoon (about 8-10 minutes) Take off the heat and add 5 Tablespoons of cold unsalted butter cut into 1 Tablespoon pieces add one at a time, stirring until smooth, add a pinch of salt and stir again!! Strain through a fine sieve (fine as in small little holes, not as in "Damn Oscar! I look so fine in this shirt!") into a bowl and place saran wrap directly onto the curd and refrigerate for at least an hour. You can also make this the night before and chill it all night long, just don't eat it all up before the next day, believe me, you will be tempted...

Whip up 1 cup of heavy fat filled whipping cream till stiff, then gently fold into the chilled passion fruit curd. Oh yes, can I get an amen? Fold in some sliced up banana and dollop it right into that gorgeous meringue.

Get a white chocolate bar, preferably from Jacques Torres Chocolates and with a potato peeler, shave off some white chocolate over the top and just go haphazardly all over the pavlova. You just add however much white chocolate you think is enough. You are in charge of your pavlova, you work the pavlova, don't let the pavlova work you.

To finish, sift some powdered sugar (10 X to us peeps in the pastry biz) and then just stand back and admire your work.

Notice my daughter oh so slyly sneaking a taste of the powdered sugar

You cant deny that this is truly a shizzert. Its clear that the model wearing this gorgeous piece of art work looks so unhappy because she has in fact NOT had any shizzert.

But to tell you the truth, if I was wearing that shirt I would be able to smile the most celestial smile even if I had no shizzert EVER, I'm not hating, I'm just stating.... OSCAR! OSCAR! OSCAR! Can you hear me!?!?!?!? This link will take you right over to the Oscar de la Renta website, be warned...
http://www.oscardelarenta.com/default.aspxfolderId=/shoponline/readytowear#styleNumber=7n731&

Here is the shizzert all served up on some of my favorite dessert plates. Notice the celestial glow that instantly appeared once the shizzert was served up for the family.

Enjoy and report back to me!!

Back to life, Back to reality, however do you want it? However do you need it?

Ragu to Maialino

2010-03-13T09:06:00.003-05:00

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This past Tuesday I had a fun food-filled day and really, there is nothing wrong with that.

It started at Jacques Torres Chocolates in Soho with my good friend Fran Carpentier. Being aware of the day we had ahead of us we attempted to maintain given our surroundings. Fran is a diabetic so she started with an apple so we wouldnt have a "Shelby drink your juice" moment.
By the time we met up it was 10:30 a.m. and with my horrible habit of skipping breakfast (I know, I know it's the worse thing you can do, I'll get on it...) I started to feel some hunger pains. I decided the best bet was to share some chocolate covered cherries with Fran.
Here's how I justified eating chocolate covered cherries at 10:30 a.m. Cherries are fruit, we are always told to eat more fruits and veggies to keep a healthy diet, fruit = healthy. These cherries are dried cherries, dried fruit is always lining stores like Whole Foods and various other health food stores, operative word there is HEALTH.
Fact - Dark chocolate has more antioxidants then green tea. So really, eating these is the equivalent of downing a shot of wheat grass. (Something I will never ever do and I dont have to with these morsels of health food nuggets over at Jacques Torres Chocolates)
Fran and I had an appointment at 1:00 p.m. so I decided that I would do "The Devil Wears Prada" diet for the day; starve myself until I am about to pass out and then eat a cube of cheese except I replaced the cheese with chocolate covered cherries, same thing really.

My friend Fran Carpentier has a 1 degree of seperation to everyone in the food world and everyone LOVES her. Going out with Fran is like going out with a "made man" from The Soprano's, everyone bow's down and recognizes when Fran appears. If there is any list to be on, not only is Fran on the list but she is on the V.I.P. list.
Oh mommy likes this, a lot, a lot, A LOT.

From there we headed up to a Ragu event, www.recipeforagoodstart.com partnered up with Molly Ringwald who has 8-month-old twins and she really, REALLY looks UH-mazing! This was hard for me to stomach since my ass still had its own zipcode when my daughter was 8-months-old but I didn't hold it against her. What I will hold against her is the fact that she had dinner, in Paris, with the one, the only Christian Loubitoun. DO YOU MIND!?!?!?!? I cant even deal with this sort of information, I mean for real. They probably even spoke in French the whole evening, damn show off's. I spent about 5 minutes meeting Molly Ringwald and I manage to turn the conversation to shoes... I think I may have some issues here
But I digress...
Recipe for a good start is a Ragu recipe contest geared towards helping busy moms come up with some good dinner ideas. Ragu has a more then a full serving of veggies in every 1/2 cup of all of its sauces. Making it easy breezy for moms to get some veggies into our kids like a stealth bomber. (does it sound like I got a little brainwashed at the Ragu event?) Dinner can be the bane of many moms existence at times (including this one) so any help is always appreciated. There is a $5000.00 scholarship prize for the winning recipe so go get a bottle of Ragu and bust-a-move in your kitchen and whip up something yummy and enter what you come up with.
Fran and I were seated at a table that was filled with various dishes cooked with guess what?
Ragu!! I had a taste (keeping my Devil Wears Prada diet in mind) of the braised chicken, braised in guess again, Ragu! And it was really tasty I have to say and I do not lie when it comes to food. Other then that I am a pathological liar*
When we left we got some swag bags filled with guess what? A bottle of Ragu sauce (shocking I know) a lasagna pan (that probably weighs about 53 lbs) a box of lasagna, do you think they are sending some hints on what to go home and make for dinner here?
We lugged our ginormous 80lb gift bags down to The Chelsea Market for the ivillage/Dove chocolate fete to continue getting our food groove on.
The space was decorated in so much chocolate brown (carpet, bunting, couches, pillows and bowls of Dove chocolates) we felt like we were actually in a chocolate.

- My colors are milk chocolate brown and dark chocolate brown -

There were stations for getting hand massages (for the life of me that just sounds whorish and I cant pinpoint as to why) mini-beauty treatments for hair and make up and a bar that was pairing up wine and chocolates. Now I am usually not shy to get day drunk but with my dinner reservations at Maialino later that evening, I refrained. We also decided to forgo the beauty treatments offered (cuz we are already some hot hot mama's)
Fran and I took a seat on one of the chocolate brown couches and took in the scenery. Some guy sitting close to us asked if we were bloggers, I told him no thanks, my Doctor gave me a cream already and I am no longer contagious.

It's way too much fun to give off color answers in a crowded loud place. But thats my thing.

This little fete was quickly turning into a cluster fuck of people waiting in lines for various beauty treatments and before it got too crowded and we weren't able to get out of that place without a struggle, we decided to blow that joint and move on.
It was time for me to go and pick up my daughter from her swimming lesson and then home to get her dinner before I went to my final destination for the day. I made braised chicken legs in soy sauce, mirin, sake and scallions along with miso soup and rice. Sorry Ragu, my daughter is all about her Asian foods. Its not a meal without miso soup and rice for her and I have to say that I just love it.

Finally!!! On to Maialino. Maialino is the latest from the-do-no-wrong restaurant genuis, Danny Meyer. Hey Danny can ya send down a shake shack down here in Tribeca? Mommy wants...
Maialino is a Rome style Italian restaurant. (Maialino means "little pig" or "suckling pig" and at times I have very much felt like both of those things) I wont lie, that doesn't mean that much too me. Only because I am not proffecient in Italian food. It could have been a Siclian style restaurant and I would not have known the difference. But hey, not to sound like Kirstie Alley, I was just excited to eat a full meal.
Its in the renovated famous Gramercy Park Hotel, where all the rock stars used to stay and some of the movie "Almost Famous" was filmed. That was the movie that Kate Hudson actually showed some promise of any talent, that little glimpse just went down the crapper after that movie.
Back to Maialino, even with a very hard to get reservation (I know peeps who know peeps...) we had to wait for a table to clear, no worries! We cooled our heels at the bar and let the drinking of fine wine begin.
Shortly after we got our drinks we were seated at a great table.
To give you an idea of how popular and crowded this restaurant is, people are more then willing to wait for up to 2 hours for a table and people are also more then happy to sidle up to the bar and eat dinner there. Its loud and vibrant and fun, so much fun.
The noise level is high enough to drown out the cackle of Rachel Ray whom was seated at the table next to us but low enough that the 5 women seated at our table were able to have conversations with each other without yelling.
A bread basket from the heavens was brought to our table and we all began to enjoy. Even the breadsticks that are usually not more then flavorless vessels to deliver carbs and calories to your body were amazing, so so so perfect, crunchy and full of flavor.
The waiter came over to explain the menu and he was great, he was even able to deal with me and my smart ass comments.
I choose the Crostone di Fegato | Filone, Chicken Liver & Aged Balsamic to start, this is wonderful divine chicken livers cooked with aged Balsamic and spread on bread, bread made by angels.
It was similar to Foie Gras, basically anything with a liver and I am in. Maybe its me making up to my liver for what I did to it in my 20's ? The chicken livers were so creamy and soft, it was like a big stick of room temperature budda. It was like budda.
For my main course we decided to share the suckling pig and because it sounded so damn good, we got some pasta as well. I got the Tonnarelli Cacio e Pepe | Pecorino & Black PepperLa Tur (Piemonte) long curly pasta with black pepper, one of my girlfriends got the RAVIOLO AL UOVO, ravioli pasta with a soft cooked egg yolk inside so when you cut into it the egg yolk would ooze out. The super amazing generous chef sent our table the pasta with some fish in it, I know, I should be a food writer...
I didnt write it down and today is Friday... All of the pasta was so amazing. Seriously it was so perfectly cooked and all of the flavors were perfectly balanced. I bet if it had too, this pasta could cure some diseases, it was that magical.
By the time the suckling pig came to the table I was stuffed (The Devil Wears Prada diet made it so my stomach had shrunk and I was becoming full very easy) Never fear, I am a trooper and was able to carry on!!!! The suckling pig, well, I have no words. Well I do have one, EPIC!!!! The skin was so crispy and was barely attached to the pork, pork that would just fall apart at the sight of a fork. Food this amazing is when you find yourself eating for the flavor even though you can barely breath let alone take another bite. I persevered, I'm a tough chick like that.
The chef also sent to our table Patate al Forno | Roasted Potatoes & Rosemary, Trevisano | Red Wine Braised Radicchio. Its a good damn thing we had a big table, one gorgeous plate of food after another seemed to endlessly come out from the kitchen.
We ate what we could and had the rest wrapped up to take home. It would be against some culinary food law punishable by caning to let any of this food go to waste.

On to dessert. Holy love of all things sacred! The pastry chef didn't just send out everything on the dessert menu, she (Pastry sous chef, Jennifer Shelbo) came out with it to explain everything.
Torta della nonna is a mix of toasted pine nuts and lemony custard, tartufo—fudgy gelato with a brandied cherry in the center, UH-maaaazing! A ricotta panna cotta that was beyond good, I swear, I got weak in the knees when I tasted it. It had an apple compote gently placed on top and was so delicate just like the panna cotta. I would get down on all fours and bark like a dog for this panna cotta.
There were other delicious desserts but I lost my vision after the panna cotta.

Food this good is is more then just eating, fork to mouth, chew, swallow and digest. Food this good is like making sweet love down by the fire. Everyone deserves food this good. Surely if everyone had food like this there would be a lot less evil in the world.

Join me next week when I blog about a shirt that Oscar De La Renta clearly made specifically with me in mind so surely I should have it... its so heavenly its inspiring a food creation in its honor.

Peace out bitches

* denotes a sarcastic remark, I am not a pathological liar but I play one on T.V. **
** denotes another sarcastic remark

2010-03-10T16:22:00.004-05:00

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Damn! Is that velvet in my closet?

Well as most of you have noticed it is now the month of March. I know it only comes around once a year but it is kinda hard to miss...

Although I don't care for too many rules when it comes to fashion. There is one that I am religious about.When is it ok to wear velvet?

I will tell you when October - February, no exceptions. Back in 1993 I was a nanny in N.J. for a family from the South. Besides their raging racist conservative views they were ok people. (I am not implying that all people from the South are conservative racists, I am just writing about the people that I lived with that were conservative raging racists that just happen to be from the South)

The "Mrs" had a handbook on how to be a proper southern young lady. True story, this was not a parody either, this was deadly serious. This raging racist family promised me that after I was with them long enough I wouldn't even be able to stomach dating a yankee ever again. Another true story. (This relationship ended quickly and horribly which sad to say was a happy ending, for me) Fast-forward 2002, I married a Japanese, I am pretty sure you could actually hear both of my grandfather's turn in their grave that day...
Lucky lucky me got to go on vacation with them (not my dead grandfathers, the racist family from the South) to their Mecca, Sea Island, Georgia.
On one sweltering afternoon while their son was napping and I was bored out of my head counting down the seconds until we left "vacation" I began to read this handbook on how to be a proper young southern lady. After skimming through a chapter that broke down a girls personality by the style of silverware she chose for her bridal registery, I found a chapter on fashion and the only thing I got from this Aryan race hand book was this sound advice, anyone worth their salt wouldn't be caught dead wearing velvet through the months of March - September.
I have to say, this actually makes perfect sense. March & April just cry out for pretty colors to be worn while gently layering through these crazy weather months. May - September are months filled with hot (and depending where you are, humid) months, clearly, no place for velvet.
I was going through my closet today and found the most gorgeous chocolate brown VELVET blazer. Dontcha just know it, tags still on it and I didn't even wear it ONCE. Oh how I suck mightily for not donning this most gorgeous piece. It comes from a store on 29 Spring street. He is a Korean designer which actually really scared me cuz I didnt think any garment was going to comfortably fit on my very non-Asian body frame... but alas!! The fit is divine and very well made. At least I can console myself that when I get my winter clothes out of storage (something a great number of us New Yorkers have to do) I will have a brand new piece to start off with for fall/winter, so yay! A light at the end of my velvet tunnel. Ok, that just sounded bad on so many levels.
The name of the store is Jaeyoon Jeong Collection, say that 3 times really fast!! He designs for women and men and his collections are strong clean lines but very feminine. Its a small store that holds a really big selection. Do yourself a favor and go over there and see what he has going for spring/summer or go to www.jaeyoonjeong.com I will head down there asap buy something great for the warmer months, bury it in my closet and post and write about it as I clean out my closet for fall/winter.. Place sarcasm up in there, I wont let you down!

Damn! Is that velvet in my closet?

2010-03-08T21:11:00.001-05:00

Well as most of you have noticed it is now the month of March. I know it only comes around once a year but it is kinda hard to miss... Although I don't care for too many rules when it comes to fashion. There is one that I am religious about. When is it ok to wear velvet? I will tell you when October - February, no exceptions. Back in 1993 I was a nanny in N.J. for a family from the South. Besides their raging racist conservative views they were ok people. (I am not implying that all people from the South are conservative racists, I am just writing about the people that I lived with that were conservative raging racists that just happen to be from the South) The "Mrs" had a handbook on how to be a proper southern young lady. True story, this was not a parody either, this was deadly serious. This raging racist family promised me that after I was with them long enough I wouldn't even be able to stomache dating a yankee ever again. Another true story. (This relationship ended quickly and horribly which sad to say was a happy ending, for me) Fast-forward 2002, I married a Japanese, I am pretty sure you could actually hear both of my grandfather's turn in their grave that day... Lucky lucky me got to go on vacation with them (not my dead grandfathers, the racist family from the South) to their Mecca, Sea Island, Georgia. On one sweltering afternoon while their son was napping and I was bored out of my head counting down the seconds until we left "vacation" I began to read this handbook on how to be a proper young southern lady. After skimming through a chapter that broke down a girls personality by the style of silverware she chose for her bridal registery, I found a chapter on fashion and the only thing I got from this Aryan race hand book was this sound advice, anyone worth their salt wouldn't be caught dead wearing velvet through the months of March - September. I have to say, this actually makes perfect sense. March & April just cry out for pretty colors to be worn while gently layering through these crazy weather months. May - September are months filled with hot (and depending where you are, humid) months, clearly, no place for velvet. I was going through my closet today and found the most gorgeous chocolate brown VELVET blazer. Dontcha just know it, tags still on it and I didn't even wear it ONCE. Oh how I suck mightly for not donning this most gorgeous piece. It comes from a store on 29 Spring street. He is a Korean designer which actually really scared me cuz I didnt think any garment was going to comfortably fit on my very non-Asian body frame... but alas!! The fit is divine and very well made. At least I can console myself that when I get my winter clothes out of storage (something a great number of us New Yorkers have to do) I will have a brand new piece to start off with for fall/winter, so yay! A light at the end of my velvet tunnel. Ok, that just sounded bad on so many levels. The name of the store is Jaeyoon Jeong Collection, say that 3 times really fast!! He designs for women and men and his collections are strong clean lines but very feminine. Its a small store that holds a really big selection. Do yourself a favor and go over there and see what he has going for spring/summer or go to http://www.jaeyoonjeong.com I will head down there asap buy something great for the warmer months, bury it in my closet and post and write about it as I clean out my closet for fall/winter.. Place sarcasm up in there, I wont let you